I want to say “hey, I am still here” but it doesn’t matter it seems.
I want to say “I know what’s going on. I’m sorry. Be strong.” but I would just be ignored.
I want to yell and rage and ask why i am the evil one, but I won’t.
I will move forward and not spoil the life I am happy with.
Woke up with a headache and swollen, achy ankles again, but I did make myself shower and go out with my mom. We picked up her art pieces & met with the boyf for dinner. It’s good to get to spend time with them together. They genuinely get along, the boyf wants to help my mom with things she’s not strong enough to do. My mom can have a conversation with him, regardless of my input. That’s such a blessing. It brings a lot of joy to my heart. :)
Went to Best Buy and bought a case, stylus and headphones for my tablet. I want to put stickers on everything because I’m 12 years old. :P
My birthday is in about a month. I’ll be 30…it’s a big one. The boyf and I have been talking about what we’d like to do. I originally wanted a fancy night out with friends, but honestly now I think it would end up just being my mom and us. So, we’re looking at cabins (with AC) in either Eureka Springs, AR or somewhere in the Arbuckles in OK. It’s rough to pick, I’m gonna ask some friends who’ve stayed in the treehouses in Arkansas. I’d like to spend the first hours of my 30th birthday in a big, hot bath, maybe have some wine, music, seeing the stars and with my love. I think that is fitting.